things are happening

today i went to my doctor and told her i was thinking about weight loss surgery. she told me she thought i would be an awesome candidate and honestly thought i would succeed because she knows i have the right mindset and she's seen me battle weight since i started going to her. she is awesome. i actually enjoy going to her and am really motivated. she said she was excited for me and would be me up 100% for whatever i needed. she also recommended me to a surgeon in the area. i've made my consultation appointment for monday! one thing she did mention was that she thought the sleeve would be better for me because i am so young and it's less invasive. we shall see though! regardless, i'm so glad things are moving. also, it snowed today and i got to spend time with my two nieces. i have to say it was a pretty great day. 

until next time, <3

step 1 (pics post)

tomorrow i'm going to see my primary physician to inquire about weight loss surgery and get her recommendation for a surgeon. i literally can't wait. on my three hour drive from school to home home (where my doctor is) i got the idea to look at old photos and see how much my weight has yo-yoed over the years. i decided i'd put them on here because why not? it's a good reminder as to why i want this so bad. also, after going through my photos it is really sad to think about how awfully i thought of myself in high school and even through college. i'm at my highest weight i've ever been at the current moment. to look through those pictures from high school and remember the thoughts i had about myself is really quite sad....siiiiigh. anyway, let's do this. IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER.

things i realize 

it's nearly impossible to find a picture of my legs (i never let it happen)

i really ballooned over this past year

i'd do anything to be the size i was in high school when i really "hated" my body

haha not much has changed 

                                                                  (junior year prom)

(moving into my dorm freshmen year...i remember being so insecure this day because of my weight)

summer after sophomore year (got broken up with)

junior year 

                                                                      senior year

summer after college 

                                                                   christmas 2012 :(

i'm ready to change...for good.

i'm currently a 23-year-old who has been overweight since i was about twelve. it's been goin' up ever since then. i've always been the big girl with a pretty face, and quite frankly, the pretty face isn't cutting it for me anymore. i've yo-yo dieted since i was in high school, but can never keep it off. college really screwed me over in this sense. the lifestyle of a student is eat whatever is cheapest and fastest (at least that's how it was for me and pretty much everyone i know). in college i weighed anywhere from 180-230. i am now at my all time high of 253, and i am 5'5...it sucks, AND i'm still a student (in grad school). when on diets, i can usually do well for a month or so, then i fall back into old habits. my parents are actually the ones who got me going on looking into weight loss surgery and are 100% supportive. they have seen me exercise my ass off, practically starve myself, go on appetite suppressant medicine, do weight watchers, south beach and some other diet thing i tried...pretty much anything i could try to lose weight, and they have also seen me disappointed again and again. so, here i go, i'm only in the very beginning stages of researching insurance stuff right now...trying to figure out what is covered and whatnot. i'm really crossing my fingers that i can get the ball rolling soon, because i am more than ready to do this. i'm ready to be the fit, toned, thin and happy on the inside and outside girl with the pretty face. 

                                                               mom, me, dad

me 

go hokies!